The American Spectator

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New Hampshire Under Siege

(Page 3 of 3)

Start your school day without a prayer.

Without a prayer of what? Passing? Learning anything useful? Oh, without a prayer to God? You guys won't that battle a long time ago. You must be cribbing off an old list.

Pass on the secrets of evolution to future generations.

Well, for starters, it hasn't gone very well. I'm going to need another tax cut if I'm going to come up with the cash to get these wisdom teeth removed. Thanks a lot evolution!

Learn French.

For what? If the French have something to say to me, tell them to learn English. I'm not enough of a sadomasochist to learn the language of a country that has nothing to send my way but whining and carping.

Visit Massachusetts while it is still a state.

I hate it when people do snarky things like this, but…it's a commonwealth, not a state. Sorry! I guess this means you get to spend an extra week in Syria!

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