The American Spectator

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Here is what I want you to know. I understand the strength, commitment, and passion that are at the core of what we built together -- and I am determined to make our collective energy and organization a force to be reckoned with in the weeks and months ahead.

Ugh. Somebody get Teresa on the phone. It's time to stage an intervention. Look at the exit polls, my friend. You inspired, if anything, an extreme lack of passion. Nobody voted for you. Rather, 56 million people voted against George W. Bush. That's too bad for your voters, but worse for you. They only have to live through four more years of George Bush. You have to be John Kerry for the rest of your life. And, in case you haven't heard, you won't be running against Bush in 2008. You better take personality enhancement classes if you want to run against Arnold or John McCain in the next go-around. (You remember John McCain, right? He's the guy you praised at every turn and attempted to entice into joining you on your ticket. Good luck countering those commercials.)

Let's roll up our sleeves and get back to work for our country. Thank you, John Kerry.

Sure, sure. But I just have one question I'm reluctant to ask: Does this mean you're going to be on television constantly for the next four years indignantly deriding every press release to come out of the White House? Yeah, that's what I thought.

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Education, Health Care, John McCain, Television, Social Security, Energy