The American Spectator

Reader Mail

(Page 7 of 15)

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I cannot thank you enough for publishing the letter from Fransje de Waard (Mrs.). After reading her heartfelt sentiments, I didn't have to wait until November 3rd to cry. Of course, mine were tears of laughter.

My first thought, once I picked myself up from the floor, was of the Arrogant Worms' classic pop tune, "I Hear the Screams of the Vegetables." After some reflection, I recalled another literary classic from an earlier era: "English as She is Spoke," an English phrasebook for Portuguese students, published in 1855 by Pedro Carolino. Mr. Carolino's accomplishment is made remarkable by the fact that he neither spoke nor wrote English. His opus was produced by using a Portuguese-French phrasebook, then a French-English dictionary. This multiple-filter translation protocol produced such gems as "Passêmos pôr êste prádo. Cômo â campína é boníta! cômo âs árvores estão frondósas!," translated as "Go through that meadow. Who the country is beautiful! who the trees are thick!"

p>Among the more notable fans of Sr. Carolino's work was Mark Twain, who wrote, "Nobody can add to the absurdity of this book, nobody can imitate it successfully, nobody can hope to produce its fellow; it is perfect." I daresay that Fransje de Waard (Mrs.) has achieved a similar degree of perfection. Again, thank you. br> -- Patrick Burkhart br> Whitefish, Montana /p>

Mrs. de Waard doesn't mind shooting from the hip. A lot of tough language and not much substance. If the post-election doom and gloom that she is so fearful of becomes reality it will certainly be attributable to her cowardly attitude and that of other Euro-weenies like her.

p>I'm curious to know her age. She apparently has forgotten that the Netherlands were not rebuilt in a day; mostly through the generosity of the Marshall Plan. Oh well, gratitude is not something that America should count on, because it is becoming increasingly rare from most of our former allies. br> -- Jerry McDonald br> Reno, Nevada /p> p> All I have to say to Fransje de Waard (Mrs.) of Amsterdam is, "So long, farewell, and perhaps we'll meet again when/if you ever wake up."

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