The American Spectator

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Let me put it this way: Whatever you're doing right now is likely ten times as interesting, if you're an accountant. Imagine 400 three minute speeches, all covering the same few topics. Healthcare: A right not a privilege; Bush squandered goodwill after 9/11; Clinton surpluses are now Bush deficits; We need allies to respect us; John Kerry went to Vietnam; Vietnam; Vietnam.

My brain is literally numb. I wonder what these speakers are thinking about when they're up there. I wonder how the guy who goes on at 4p.m. on Thursday and repeats the same lines everyone else has already beaten into the ground all week can do it.

There is no sign of embarrassment or lack of energy. Each speaker throws herself into the Kerry-approved litany of bland, general complaints without any real teeth. They've got to win over Middle America, you know.

Everyone out there in TV land wonders why Al Sharpton was so well received. Here's the secret: He's the only guy who got off script during this entire ordeal.

So, folks, here's the answer to your question: The 2004 Democratic Convention is an endurance test for people who have any capacity for boredom. In fact, I'm filing late Thursday before the primetime programming gets underway. I think I'll skip John Kerry's speech tonight and go watch the anarchists burn something instead.

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