The American Spectator

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Why Knot?

11.26.03 @ 12:01AM

THE RIGHT OF MARRIAGE
Re: R. H. Sager's Guess Who Came to Dinner:

One of the points Sager makes, and quickly glosses over, isn't getting enough attention in this debate: "Nearly half of all marriages end in divorce." It seems that this fact is far too easily accepted as one of those trends that just "is." I am against homosexual marriage as it will most certainly have a dilutive effect on the institution as a whole. And I think we need to find ways to return marriage to its former, more respected interpretation. Why do we have to accept the increased divorce rate and all the related social problems that come with it? Why can't we look to promote the institution and change the trend of single-parent families?

Therein lies the rub that liberals always lack: Always fighting for the "right" to have something rather than focusing on the responsibility of electing that choice. The "right" to choose, for example, vs. the responsibility one has in their sexual conduct. The right to marry vs. promoting what the responsibility of marriage entails. If we, as a society, spent more time educating young people on what the responsibility of marriage is all about, we could turn around the divorce rate and that benefits us all. By buckling to the pressure of allowing another group to join the marriage pool, solely for the sake of political correctness and inclusion, the definition of marriage becomes more stretched, and less meaningful with respect to its original intent: To provide the optimal secure setting for raising children.

Gay unions are fine. Put all those structural changes in place that levels the playing field for gay couples (taxes, visitation rights, beneficiaries, etc.). But there's no need to further erode the institution of marriage -- already on shaky ground -- just to placate the oppressed group du jour.
-- William H. Stewart
Boston, Massachusetts

R.H. Sager demonstrates why "libertarian conservative" is as much an oxymoron as "big government conservative."

Of course there's a libertarian dimension to conservatism (both original recipe and the extra crispy, Connecticut-Maine-Texas compassionate variety). But limited government doesn't mean that stop signs are immoral or that the first order of government is to get out of the way so citizens can indulge their every whim.

The story goes that someone once asked Louis Armstrong what "soul" is. The great Satchmo is reported to have answered, "If you listen to the music and you don't hear it, I can't tell you what it is." Just so. "Socially conservative types" don't need to look for reasons to oppose homosexual marriage (yet another oxymoron). The reason stares us all in the face. If Sager can't see it, no one can explain it to him. (Furthermore, if Sager argues we can't say no to a man who wants to marry another man, using his logic how could we say no to a man who wants to marry three men, his sister, a horse, and a Buick?)

And this isn't about "accepting homosexuals fully into civil society." American society is about the most welcoming on the planet. Anyone who behaves civilly -- homosexual, straight, or variations thereof -- can make his/her way quite nicely now.

Another obvious truth Sager hasn't yet stumbled over has to do with his main point. Sager is just wrong when he says marriage will tame homosexual males as it has tamed straight men. No. Marriage doesn't tame men. Women tame men.

I suggest Sager spend more time outside of Manhattan. Maybe his head would clear a little.
-- Larry Thornberry
Tampa, Florida

Mr. Sager's article had a disturbing aloofness about marriage in general and gay marriage in particular. I agree that the gay community can through other means achieve the trappings of marriage (property, domestic arrangements, living wills, etc.). But what I found disconcerting is the presumption that we are on some grand experiment at the state level on issues of gay vs. straight commitment arrangements.

The danger of course is, having let the genie out of the bottle, if the effects are found debilitating, how does society undo the damage? And at what cost? To date the track in Western societies are that once social changes are unleashed seldom are past social norms reinstated. So Mass. uncorks the bottle, what if in 10 years time it is found that such a decision was a bad one? Does one nullify the existing commitments made?

Paradoxically, I am not for a Federal Marriage Amendment. This country has traditionally left issues of social norms to states and local authority. To now federalize such social constructs permits an ever more widening intrusion into private affairs, whether gay or heterosexual.

I suggest that before we head off on this grand expression of "equality for all," we first understand why for most civil societies around the world and for hundreds of years, recognized unions were between a man and a woman. Or maybe I should just wait to move to Mass. when they enshrine polygamy.
-- John McGinnis
Arlington, Texas

At least Mr. Sager's support for homosexual marriage is couched in thoroughly honest, and modernist, terms. For fifteen hundred years marriage in the West was primarily sacramental. With the Reformation, however, a predominant Protestant authority (albeit well distributed) largely discarded the sacramental nature of marriage and replaced it with, for lack of a better term, a prevailing social nature. Divorce was soon available and eventually proliferated, though slowly. As a result of the further degradation of marriage, we now do indeed live in an age where marriage is merely a contract. The acceptance of homosexual marriage is a logical consequence of this slippery slope. Mr. Sager claims that change does not have to be for the worse. All I can say to Mr. Sager is: Look around you. Do you think things are getting better? Are we on the right track?
-- Bill Murphy
San Jose, California

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