As the Clinton presidency recedes down the hallways of history
to laughter and hisses I remain baffled by the residual figures who
remain as authoritative voices in American media. One such is
George Stephanopoulos, the ABC journalist who as a political
operator prepared himself for journalism by deceiving journalists
-- he admits it in his memoir. And then there is Dick Morris, the
political sage who for six years has been retailing personal
experiences from his days with the Clintons that are always
supposed to shed light on the Clintons' most recent pratfall or
felony. Morris has wrung more personal experiences out of his
fugitive moments with these two crooks than seems plausible. Yet
Fox News and the New York Post keep turning to him for golden
nuggets. And do you remember how he exited the Clintons'
employment? He was revealed as the habitué of a, shall we
say, footloose hooker who allowed him to have his way with her
toes. I have a poem in the works on him. Thus it begins:
He called me Dearie,
though his tastes were eerie.
For between my toes
I perchanced his nose.
He was on the telephone with the President.
Room service knocks on the door.
"Oh, Dick get off the floor."
"No, I'll have more, more, more."
This is my work in progress. Now the Clintons' successor has his
work in progress, war with the owner of that aspirin factory whom
neither Morris nor the Boy President perceived as anything but
useful diversion from Monica.
Actually, our debonair President has more on his mind than the
Rev. Osama bin Laden. He is contemplating the overthrow of Saddam
Hussein. From all I have been able to ascertain from my spies
throughout the government we shall strike before the end of the
year. One of the things holding us back in the need to replenish
our supplies of smart bombs, though some call them "brilliant
bombs." They are directed by satellite guidance rather than lasers
or visual guidance. They are effective despite weather conditions.
They will be ready soon.
What is goading the White House is alarm over the possibility
that Saddam is at work on weapons of mass destruction that could be
used soon by terrorists. The Bush administration is making the
civilized nations of the world aware of their peril. Whether they
agree with Washington, Saddam does not have much time left to slink
off into the Rev. bin Laden's hole. We remember 9/11, fellows.
